


Valence

by Splintered_Star



Series: constructive interference [3]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Complicated Relationships, F/M, Force-Sensitive Finn (Star Wars), M/M, Nightmares, Skywalker Family Drama (Star Wars), Solo Sibs, echoes and echoes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:46:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28064922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Splintered_Star/pseuds/Splintered_Star
Summary: Kylo Ren and Finn have run from the First Order together. They have a plan: find a way to hide from Snoke and then disappear into the outer rim. It’s a good plan.Like all good plans, it doesn’t last.
Relationships: Finn/Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron/Rey
Series: constructive interference [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1805965
Comments: 18
Kudos: 32





	Valence

The red string of destiny tugs him ever forward. It tangles around Kylo Ren’s throat as he walks forward, through hanging flags and woods, towards a place he swore he would never return but as a conqueror.

Finn, next to him, has no strings. He is hiding them, now, his power drawing on centuries old power worked into the rocks here. This was a place made for being hidden and for hiding.

Destiny draws him forward into the bar, into inevitability. He feels Finn’s concern, questions, this was not the plan –

Han Solo looks so old.

They stare at each other. Kylo feels endless words swarming between them, thick as flies on a corpse –

Maz steps between them, staring up at and through Kylo with her all-seeing eyes.

“Do you know what you’ve brought into this –“ She breaks off, her expression twisting, her strange power testing the edges of some black bright cord in his mind. “…You can’t hide from him, can you?”

He shakes his head. It feels like an admission of failure. Finn wraps a hand around his wrist. Kylo does not look at Han Solo. Does not react to the muttered expletive he hears.

Maz nods. “I might have something for that. Follow me, all of you.”

Deep in the caverns of Maz’s castle, the Force wraps around them all. The air is thick with old power, concealment sunk into dirt and rocks. Some people could hide down here forever and never be found.

Kylo is not one of them.

Every moment Maz and the girl spend digging through boxes, every moment Han Solo and Dameron stare at him and do not speak, every moment –

-the air is getting thicker–

Kylo tastes ozone in the back of his throat –

“Hey, I think this is-“ The girl pulls something out of a box, but Kylo–

Lightning arcs down the black bright cord in his mind. Fury like he’s never felt, his master demanding, punishing – Finn tries, but all he can do is blunt it, enough that Kylo knows that he’s screaming, clawing at his own skin and Finn’s, Finn is going to destroy himself trying to – the barest sound of “Kid, Kid, listen –“

It all cuts out.

Maz tightens the Force inhibitor around his wrist with a grim expression. Kylo Ren almost screams again just to fill the silence in his mind.

Under his hands, Kylo Ren drops away. They’ve been betrayed, this was a trap – a moment later Finn breathes out again, because Kylo’s body is still there, warm and breathing under his hands.

A Force Inhibitor, the old woman had said.

Snoke rages in the air around them. Finn tries to hide – but Maz grabs onto pathways built into the planet, baffling and confusing, entirely different from how Finn would have done it. The pressure in the Force starts to fade -

Rey from nowhere does not know what she is seeing, overlaid on the air like a mirage.

Just that it is old and powerful and /angry/, snarling and snapping; just that it is looking for something and soon it will notice her –

She has spent years hoping that she would be found. She does not know how to hide.

But she knows how to fight.

She scrambles through the boxes tucked in the wall, never taking her eyes off of whatever it is, until -

Her hand closes on something that will keep her safe.

Something flashes in the Force, jolting Finn out of his focus on the look on Kylo's face, so similar to a trooper just out of reconditioning, unsure what's real or not -

The girl cries out and drops - something that rings out in Finn's mind. A lightsaber.

Kylo stares at the unlit saber on the floor. Finn doesn't know why.

"...always wondered where that went." Han Solo picks it up from the floor, tucks it into a side pocket. "I'll give it back to him."

Maz snorts, and cleans her glasses. "Well, what a day this has been." She pushes her glasses back onto her face.

Kylo stumbles on the stairs back up to the bar. He is blind, he is deaf. He cannot feel the walls and their power, the ancient history, the people around him – if he closes his eyes he thinks he might be in a dark cave without beginning or end -

Finn catches him before he falls. Finn keeps him steady, one hand around his, through the shifting passageways. It is familiar, grounding him. Finn is inscrutable, but Finn always is.

Kylo grips back, and it helps.

When they emerge into the light, Finn hides them from any observers. He feels Maz’s odd power echo his and forces himself not to fight it. He doesn’t let go of Kylo’s hand as they tuck away into a corner of the bar.

What now, he thinks.

The girl is crying.

“When I touched the saber, I – I saw.” She wipes her eyes. “I – My parents aren’t coming back. So I’m going to go with you.”

Dameron wraps his hands around hers, murmurs to her quietly.

Kylo looks away. Tries to ignore Anakin Skywalker’s lightsaber in Han Solo’s pocket and the echoing silence in his head.

This was the plan: contact the Resistance and trade information for their focus on Snoke and any means of concealment. Between General Organa and Maz, they would have had something. 

This was not in the plan: Han Solo staring at him.

“Your mother misses you,” he says, and Kylo is glad he cannot check the truth of it. “Come back with us.”

This is not the plan: Kylo closes his eyes, and nods.

They are not prisoners. Finn sends out a tendril of investigation, but no one seems to be lying.

They are expected to give up their weapons regardless. Kylo hands over his broken crystal lightsaber without comment, and after a moment, Finn gives his blaster over. He is not asked for his own crystal, and he does not offer it.

His blaster is only a backup defense anyway. 

A Wookie looks them over and growls something that Finn doesn’t understand – then one great paw comes up in a move that has Finn tensing. All that happens is Kylo being patted on the head, but from the expression on Kylo’s face it might be an attack regardless. Finn will keep an eye out.

The Falcon is unfamiliar, and only part of it is how much taller Kylo is, now. It feels – dead and unreal, a hologram.

He looks at Han Solo, his /father/, and remembers the demand Snoke laid at his feet. That thing that he was not strong enough to do.

That thing that he no longer has to do, and the relief of that decision being taken away from him sweeps through him.

He does not know what his face shows, only that Han’s expression twists and he wraps his arm around Kylo’s shoulder.

“Ben…” 

That was never his name.

But Kylo Ren was born of power and agency, and without that, who can he be but Ben? He cannot even hold his saber without the unstable crystal betraying him. 

“We’re gonna go back, and we’ll get you situated, and-“

Old fury bubbles up in him anew and he wrenches out of the hold. “And then you’ll leave once I’m someone else’s problem?” This man, this – whetstone around his neck, this thing he cannot escape –

He did not want to do that thing Snoke had demanded of him. He did not, and yet, would anything less cut this chain –

What was the point, he thinks, if Fate would trap him anyway?

He runs away but always returns to the same places.

Han Solo does not flinch, as he might have when the boy called Ben made the same accusation. He just sighs.

“I’m going to get your uncle and drag him back too. And then I’ll stay. If you want.”

He cannot tell if Han Solo is lying.

Fury boils over but this time there are no destroyed consoles, no broken windows or bones. He has the will but not the power.

The man who was never Ben Solo walks away.

Finn watches the situation from the shadows and follows Kylo to the berth, muffling noises as he goes.

"Are we safe here?" Kylo blinks up at him. “He grabbed you." With no malice, but it made Kylo uncomfortable, so it had to be /something/. “Will he –“

Kylo's eyes widen and he shakes his head. "No, he's - he won't." His expression twists. "He's my father."

Finn blinks. He does not remember his father or what the interactions would be like. Maybe that was normal.

"And Ben was your designation? Before you got your name?"

Kylo stares at him, and then - that flicker of a smile. "Yeah."

Finn does not understand families. The idea of home is strange to him, that Kylo Ren did not come fully formed from the darkness between stars. But: this is the place and these are the people that Kylo ran from, he thinks. What he became Kylo to escape.

He does not understand families. But Finn has chosen his squadmate.

“We’ll work with the resistance until Snoke is dealt with, and then we’re gone.”

It’s not the deal they talked about, but Finn nods anyway.

The darkness is smothering him.

He reaches out for his master, for his power, for anything - but he finds nothing but his own weakness, and he knows that he has been abandoned in this isolation - if he were strong enough he would be able to break free, but he can never be strong enough, he won't ever -

Kylo Ren wakes flailing, a hand over his mouth to silence his scream.

"Shh, I've got you." Finn. Finn tucked against his side, Finn silencing him so that no one hears him. The weight of his body against his.

Kylo breathes, harsh, through his nose. Finn meets his eyes and nods, once, before letting him go and settling against his side again.

His lack of questions is a relief.

Finn tucks himself in a hidden corner of a ship made for hiding things. He can't feel Kylo, and it feels like a gap in the corner of his awareness. But he can feel everyone else, and even the ship itself around them, vital and alive in a way that the Finalizer never was. There's no way Kylo could have gone anywhere.

He pulls his kyber crystal from a pouch in his blacks and holds it, staring at its white-green glow.

He knows - he Knows, crystal clear and solid beneath his feet - that whatever power the Resistance can bring to bear, it won't be enough. Not to defeat Snoke. Battles in the Force are never decided by military might.

Finn has never raised a weapon against another intending to kill. He has escaped the Order and he will be no one's weapon.

But he will do what is necessary.

He untucks himself from the corner but not from his hiding and slips down the corridors. He cannot feel Kylo Ren, no. But it is easy to track down the red burn of his lightsaber.

The two sabers – red, and one that he thinks will be blue – lay side by side in the compartment. Their crystals chime in the Force, reacting to each other. They are not in conflict, he thinks, but not aligned either. Kylo’s rings with recognition under his hand, the crystal broken and still striving.

Finn smiles a little to himself. Then he turns to study the other saber.

Stealing one is too risky, but stealing knowledge leaves no traces.

Han Solo stares down at planet they’ve been directed to and does not land. He looks over, and Kylo does not understand his expression.

“I fucked up, kid. I know that. You deserved better and I’m sorry.” Kylo does not respond. “When all this,” he gestures vaguely at the stars, “Is sorted out, I’ll take you and your friend anywhere you wanna go and help you disappear. If you want.”

Apologies were meaningless. Han Solo could only have done what he did.

They always return to who they were.

Kylo does not say this. After a moment, Han nods and begins landing procedures.

The Resistance commanders stare them both down and ask how they got off the Finalizer.

Kylo tenses, and then -

he lies. Finn manages to not stare at Kylo as he tells a dramatic tale about seeing a childhood friend in chains and making a snap decision to escape with him. Across the room, Dameron's eyebrows go up.

Finn feels the attention of the officers slide from him, making him a minor player in Kylo's story. Letting him be invisible.

Behind his mask, Finn is grateful.

Kylo feels like he has been talking in front of Resistance leadership for hours. Perhaps he has – he is loose in time, unable to tell. He is unable to control his speech, either to slow it or organize it. 

In the corner of his eye, he sees droids flickering around, catching his spilled words. Information flickers in the air, dates and call signs and ship designations. Across the room, he sees General Organa, his mother.

Finally, someone asks: “Tell us about the superweapon.”

Kylo lets out a breath.

“Starkiller. Larger than the Death Star.” He wracks his brain, trying to remember details from Hux’s annoyed lectures about his weapon. “Hollowed out planet. Uses the power of a star and feeds it through kyber into a blast.”

“Where is it?” General Organa speaks for the first time. He does not look at her.

“-Illum.” The word comes out breathless. Around the room, people mutter, sitting up in their chairs. “They’re using Illum. The natural kyber veins. I have the coordinates.”

He had been so proud, finding the lost planet at his master’s demand. He’d spent days in meditation, without food or water until he’d come out, the coordinates scratched into the wall.

He’d felt so proud.

He does not know what he feels now.

“We’ll send a team to investigate.” General Organa’s voice cuts through the noise. “Any information you can provide about the area would be helpful.”

Kylo lets out a breath, and nods, and lets more words spill out.

He and Finn were assigned different rooms.

It was no slight, he knew. There was no reason to expect them to do otherwise.

Kylo Ren stares up at the ceiling and feels unmoored, as if he is still in a dark cave with his senses taken from him.

The door to his room slides open. He looks over –

“I’m not used to sleeping alone,” Finn says, “Is it all right if I bunk here?”

Kylo smiles.

The next morning Finn slips out before anyone else in the base is awake, but his smell lingers in the bed, and Kylo clings to it for long moments before getting up. 

He should not think on this. He should not indulge in this weakness that can be taken from him.

Kylo begins to bury the impulse behind fog – and pauses.

He touches the Force inhibitor on his wrist, this hard limit between his mind and the outside world. Nothing out, nothing in.

He breathes in deep, and lets the fog fade.

"There's definitely a base there, and a big one, but we're not certain it's Ilum." Kylo glowers, but the commander ignores it. "Nonetheless, it's still a valuable find, so thank you."

They have been called up before the officers again. Finn suppresses a blink. He did not expect to be thanked for incomplete information. 

The Resistance is so different from the First Order. There is a stiffness that is missing, an emotion in the back of his mind made noticeable by its absence. It is a difficult thing to mimic, but Finn is working on it.

General Organa is watching him. She is the only one of the high command who is. The rest are ignoring him in favor of Kylo, but she -

His kyber crystal, tucked carefully in a pocket, pulses as if in recognition.

Every part of his self freezes as he is suddenly aware of the barest flicker of power brushing up against his.

"I believe it's Ilum," she says. "The Order is clearly getting a steady supply of Kyber from /somewhere/. But more proof is needed."

General Organa is Force sensitive. It is not a surprise, but still -

Finn buries himself deeper inside of himself. He barely keeps himself present enough to watch his surroundings.

"I understand you came here to deal with Snoke," General Organa says. She has not reacted to Finn hiding. "And we will. But we can't ignore this. We have to deal with this first, before any confusion caused by your defection has calmed."

Does she realize that he has power that he has hidden? He isn't certain. An officer wouldn't leave a potential threat like a Force user uncontrolled. She must be waiting until he's out of the room.

Beside him, oblivious, Kylo Ren snarls but nods stiffly.

"You're dismissed."

The rest of the day Finn waits to be noticed, waits for thoughts to settle on him like shackles - but all he feels is the occasional gentle flicker of General Organa, and no one else.

Finn slips into his room earlier this time, and doesn't immediately curl into bed with him.

"General Organa is Force Sensitive." Finn says it like it's a revelation. His voice is flat. "You didn't say."

Kylo blinks. He was so used to it being common knowledge that - "I figured you would know."

But of course, according to the Order, the Force didn't exist.

"You thought -" Finn exhales sharply. He's annoyed, Kylo realizes. He's not sure Finn has ever gotten annoyed at him before. He thinks Finn realizes it at the same moment. His expression shutters.

It grates at his throat, but Kylo looks away and says, "I - sorry." Finn inhales. "There's - been a lot going on, lately."

Finn huffs a laugh after a moment, and drops onto the bed next to him. "Yeah." Finn doesn't look annoyed anymore, but Kylo doesn't know what his expression means. "Is there anyone else that's -"

"Not that I know of." A concession: "Well, Rey and Skywalker, but you knew that."

Finn nods. He's tucked up against Kylo's side. "I think the General realized I am, but -"

Kylo shrugs. "She might not mention it to anyone else." He's long since given up trying to understand his mother's logic.

Finn exhales, and leans into Kylo's shoulder. Then pulls back, spitting, hair in his mouth.

“Shit, sorry,” Kylo starts. But Finn is laughing, face scrunched up, and Kylo trails off.

“You need to start braiding it again.” Finn tugs on a strand. Kylo looks away, embarrassed, gesturing with his inhibitor. He never learned how to do it by hand. “Oh. I can?”

“-yeah, okay. If you want.”

In another life, this meeting would never happen.

Poe Dameron would bear too many scars in his mind from the man Kylo Ren became to ever try and look for the boy Ben Solo once was.

But here, his mind free of the damages of torture at the hands of someone he thought he knew, Poe seeks him out.

“So it was all your idea, then?” Kylo glares at him. “’Cause that’s not how it looked when I was, ya know, there.”

Fucking Dameron. Kylo can’t mind trick him, and thinks of telling him to mind his own business.

But Ben Solo would answer, and Poe expects him to be Ben Solo. Kylo hates it. The longer he stays the more he will be trapped in the shape of Ben Solo, the sticky mire of who he was supposed to be. Already he cannot do anything but what he is expected to.

“Look, what did you think the big wigs would believe? Long lost friendship or one stormtrooper breaking conditioning /and/ convincing me?” Poe raises his eyebrows. Kylo huffs. “Look, the General knows, right? So what does it matter.”

He’s a better liar than he was, but not so much better that he could lie to her face. 

Then again, he thinks, touching the inhibitor.

“Ben,” Kylo twitches. Maybe Poe notices. Poe huffs. “I don’t believe you, but you’re right, she does know. So fine.”

It’s enough. 

Finn has tucked himself away in a corner of the base. As much as the Order claimed the Resistance was sloppy and unorganized, their patrols are thorough, and it’s taken Finn a few days to find the least used paths.

General Organa has not told anyone about him, as far as he can tell, but he still feels her attention flick in his direction.

Disappearing completely would be more suspicious, so even though it makes his skin prickle, Finn doesn’t hide himself as deeply as he can. He keeps one part of his mind watching for people noticing him, and the rest –

In one hand, his green-white kyber crystal. In the other, focusing lenses and connectors.

There are no blueprints for a lightsaber, Kylo had said. Each one was unique with it’s construction guided by the Force.

Finn frowns at his crystal and focuses.

After an hour of meditating and digging his heels in, Finn is no closer to a saber than before. He scowls, still getting used to letting himself be annoyed, and treks back to more occupied areas of the base.

Rey looks up from a half-rebuilt engine and scrambles up to her feet.

“Oh! I was looking for you earlier, but-“ Finn blinks at her. “I found this while I was working, and – it made me think of you? I’m not sure why, but I thought you would know.”

She’s holding out a tube. When he takes it in hand it fits in his grip easily.

It feels – right.

“Yeah. I do.” He smiles at her, like he’s supposed to. “Thanks.”

Rey grins and turns back to her work. Finn tucks the tube into a pocket.

Resources are resources.

Han Solo leaves as soon as the map to Skywalker is deciphered. Before he goes, he hands Kylo his lightsaber back and says, “I’ll be back.”

Kylo looks at the lightsaber and then at his father. A single frantic thought – maybe if he does it now his master will – but he ignores it. It was easier, when he did not have his weapon.

He nods because he doesn’t know what else to say. Han grabs his shoulder, and then is gone.

A month in, and Finn thinks he’s figured out a mask. He can’t quite figure out Dameron’s friendliness, but he can manage politeness. It’s enough for people to start to ignore him.

Though he still feels General Organa – and only her – watching him sometimes.

He keeps busy, discussing Order tactics with officers, dissecting past and current engagements. Their reactions confuse him, sometimes, but he doesn’t let it show. 

Their priorities seem focused on the protection of civilians rather than the advancement of territory. It’s – interesting.

And then at the end of the day, he slips into Kylo’s room –

-and he drops the mask.

The girl sits inside of a whirlwind of sand and scraps of machinery. Her fingers clench into her own skin. Without the Force, Kylo cannot tell what she feels, but thinks it might be terror.

Dameron paces on the outside of the whirlwind and doesn’t stop Kylo from approaching. Later, Kylo will think about that.

Is this how others felt? Seeing the evidence of power but unable to touch it?

"I can't make it /stop/."

The words echo inside of Kylo's head. So scared. So familiar.

"You can." Rey looks up at him, her eyes wide. Kylo walks through the sandstorm and reaches for her. "This is your power. You can control it." She shakes her head. Frustration arcs through him without grounding. "Your emotions are feeding into it. The more you panic, the worse it will get."

It's Skywalker's lesson, reworded. When he was younger he thought his teacher meant to stop /feeling/, and resented it - but without the Force, without Snoke's whispers, he cannot recall why he thought so.

Rey breathes, in and out, fast and then slow. "Like a sand dune," She mutters. She moves, her feet shifting in something like muscle memory.

He's not sure what she means, but it works. Slowly, the sandstorm fades and the girl emerges. She shakes off sand and looks up at him.

"You need a teacher."

It cannot be him. He is muzzled and powerless - and yet. He remembers the lessons. The knowledge remains, of the Jedi and of the Sith and those who were neither.

That may be its own power.

Rey smiles, hopeful.

General Organa has called Finn into her office. Alone.

She looks at him. Finn hides, shuffling his power and his emotions behind the mask of a soldier. Officers never look for more than that.

She looks at him, and he realizes with a sharp crack that she’s actually /looking/ at him. She sees him, and she sees the mask, and –

She could tear him apart. She could, pry under the mask, unravel him, do what reconditioning and Phasma and Snoke could not, simply because she looks and actually /sees/ him-

She could, but she doesn't.

She lets out a breath. One side of her mouth quirks up.

“You are more skilled than you let on. But from what I’ve heard of the Order’s training, that doesn’t surprise me.” She looks him dead on. “I understand why you hide from me. As long as it doesn’t impact the war, you can hide all you wish. And I promise that I will not lie to you.”

She is not lying now. Finn checks every way he knows how and she allows it.

“In fact,” she says, and the Force rings with the truth of it, “I’d like to make an offer to you.”

Finn comes to his room, as is now his habit. Kylo looks up when Finn comes in. Finn looks at him – is there something different in his face? But the universe does not ring truth back at him, and Kylo cannot tell without it.

The difference passes in silence, and Finn settles next to him on the bed.

white on white and echoing voices, infinite layering until the bones vibrate in time, until it reaches that place inside that no one is allowed to touch -

Finn wakes up. The transition to consciousness is sharp and sudden and completely silent.

Next to him, Kylo Ren snuffles into his shoulder. His weight is warm and heavy.

Finn closes his eyes and breathes out, reaches out with the Force. Kylo is a void but that is expected. Across the base, the banked fire of General Organa glows - Rey, tucked into Poe's side like Kylo is tucked into his own. Reality settles down around him again.

Almost absently, he pets Kylo's hair.

Kylo Ren put him through Reconditioning. Kylo is the one who ordered him put in that white on white room where they tried to pull his mind apart.

You were expected to turn your squadmates in for Reconditioning. It was for their own good. If you cared for them, you would want them to be the best they could be.

They haven't spoken of it since they left. But neither have they spoken of the dark cave Finn saw in flickers, that entity he sensed that could tear apart a mind with only its own will and whispers of this is what is best for you, this is a challenge you must meet to be stronger.

Kylo has nightmares too, Finn knows.

Kylo's hair is soft under his fingers, and Finn thinks about choices.

Rey learns eagerly, for all that Kylo hasn't done more than katas and the most basic of meditation.

They spar with wooden swords in a workout room - Kylo intends to judge her skills, but maintaining his own skills without the Force turns out to be challenge enough.

She clearly misses her staff and keeps over correcting to compensate for weight that isn't there. Kylo's own lightsaber remains shoved in a drawer in his room, hidden to avoid temptation.

"Kick his ass, babe!" Poe shouts from the side of the room. Rey smiles at him. Kylo rolls his eyes and goes to knock her off her feet. She dodges, but not without a scramble.

"Focus," he mutters.

"You walked into a doorframe when Finn smiled at you last week!"

Kylo's just distracted enough by her gall - and by Poe falling over laughing across the room - that she gets a lucky swipe in, and, well, then it's /on/.

General Organa’s training is nothing like Kylo Ren’s.

Power is not the aim. Power is hardly mentioned. What she talks about is leverage. Efficiency. She does not stop a blaster bolt – she tilts the aim a degree so that the shot goes wide. Misdirection.

If done correctly, she says, no one will notice you doing it at all.

She has not bid him to silence. But he remains so, even from Kylo.

Leverage, he thinks.

Kylo isn’t sure why he’s been invited to yet another meeting where they try to find a way to neutralize Starkiller Base without destroying Illum, but here he is.

"Rose." A girl off to the side straightens in her chair, startled to be addressed by the General. "You have an idea."

She stares at General Organa, wide eyed. "Um." Another similar-looking woman grins and elbows her. "I mean. Okay." She turns to Kylo. "Starkiller base. Does it run on a centralized computer system?” Kylo blinks. “Because if it runs off of one network, and I think it must, otherwise – anyway, if I can get onto the network, we can shut it down from the inside.”

Kylo slowly nods. “…The firing mechanism, definitely.” Kylo scours his memory for Hux’s lectures about the elegancy of his system, the efficiency of the design. “My access codes won’t work.”

“Nonetheless, it’s definitely something to investigate.” General Organa nods from the front of the table. “Any way around a direct confrontation is worthwhile. Rose, get whatever information you need.”

He is not certain if General Organa phrased it such so that she did not have to call him Kylo – but then again, he is.

Kylo's lightsaber floats between them. Finn still won't touch it fully, investigating the construction with the Force instead.

His fingers brush the edge of the casing, barely not touching.

"The crystal." He asks. "Will it ever stop bleeding?"

Kylo stares at him. He knows what he has been taught by Skywalker and Snoke. He has an answer, but it does not emerge from his lips.

Finn nods, as if that silence is an answer, and continues investigating.

Do we ever stop bleeding? Can a broken will reform, wounds turning into scabs turning into barely remembered scars?

We will never again be what we once were– and yet, and yet.

Destiny grabs Kylo and he stomps into Rose’s workspace, Finn a few steps behind him.

"You're trying to get into the mainframe, so you can disable it." Rose nods, hesitantly. She opens her mouth to speak. He sees Finn gesture for silence out of the corner of his eye and a warmth slides into his stomach. "My access codes won't work. I never had authorization for that." He looks down and makes a gesture to grab a datapad, and then frowns at himself and grabs it by hand. "But-"

It had been spite that made him do it, spite and back up plans and the challenge, trying to glean information from such an ordered mind without leaving traces -

He scrawls a series of numbers. He snarls, frustration bubbling up, because his own mind is never sufficient.

If he had the Force he would be able to /know/, pull the truth out of the universe no matter where it was hidden, if he had the Force he would be -

He sets the datapad down with a clatter. It's not enough. It won't be enough.

Finn looks over his shoulder. "Hx-398 - is that Hux's access code?"

Rose makes a sharp noise. "Wait, seriously? You -"

Kylo looks away. Frustration claws at his throat. "I - it's missing the last few numbers, I don't -" he should admit his own failure, admit that he's worthless and -

Rose grabs the datapad. She doesn't seem disappointed. "I can absolutely work with this, I have algorithms just for this - are there any numbers you're not sure of?" Kylo blinks, indicates a few with his stylus. "Okay, this is great, thank you so much."

Kylo stares at her, not sure what he's being thanked for. But she's off in a flurry of activity, and Finn just shrugs at him when he looks over.

"Look," Kylo throws up his hands in frustration. Rey still isn’t grasping the nature of the Force, for all she uses it easily. "Every living thing in the galaxy impacts every other living thing. Everything is connected to everything else. There are - cords, strung between every object and every person and every star. Sensing the Force is being able to tell where and how those cords are tied. /Using/ the Force is grabbing the cords and /pulling/."

This is worse, somehow, than trying to explain what he felt to Force nulls as a child. Then, he had Snoke reassuring him that he was better than them - then, he was solid in his knowledge of the truth that others could never see. 

But now he is null, and now he is the one who cannot speak the truths he knows. He was always able to /show/ before. He cannot adjust her mind's posture - he cannot touch her in a way that matters.

But Rey is nodding, seriously, down at the floor. She's stopped flinching at his flares of temper or moving like she expects him to strike her. "I - maybe. I'll try again." She settles down on the floor again to meditate.

Kylo sits down across from her and tries to ignore the silence ringing in his head. The great eye of the universe slides past him without seeing.

Rey comes back out of it earlier than expected, gasping and smiling.

"It's - I guess it's not like cords, for me? it's like... there's a great infinite something? Or." She fidgets with a mechanical something. It's almost reassuring, to see her struggle with words too. "There's a - part of me that overlaps with the same part in everyone else, and for a second I could step into that place where everyone else was?“

She looks to him for approval, and he inclines his head. Her smile is blinding, and Kylo does not react.

Rey does not seek out power or freedom. She is not a potential ally or a future challenger. Kylo is just – killing time. That’s all.

"Hey, I never thanked you for getting me outta there!"

Poe Dameron is smiling, but he looks at Finn with curiosity. He would have noticed, what Kylo had done in the report of their escape.

Finn shrugs. "It needed to be done." It's an evasion. Any pilot would have worked. There had been a lot of prisoners in the cells that day.

“You’re a hard guy to track down, you know.” 

Poe’s still smiling, but he looks at him little bit like how General Organa does it – like he might actually see.

But Poe isn’t as skilled as she is, and there are still some assumptions for Finn to hide behind.

"Just trying to stay out of the way, really." A brief smile, rueful. "Everything is kind of... a lot, I guess."

Poe grins. He's not doing a threat assessment, Finn decides.

"Well, if you ever need a hand, let me know. I owe you one." Poe claps him on the shoulder, and Finn suppresses a flinch.

Rey stares up, suddenly, her attention caught by something that Kylo cannot see.

A moment later, the announcement: the Falcon has returned.

Ah.

Kylo doesn’t want to go – but he can do nothing else.

He has not spoken of what happened the night he left. Han has not asked, which was not a surprise. Leia has not asked either, which is a surprise.

His mind is so quiet and his memory twists when he looks back at them, incompatible images layered over themselves.

Finn grips his hand and does not let go.

Luke Skywalker looks at the man at his nephew's side, and Looks -

Luke has always seen what could be before he saw what was. He looks at Finn and sees, in flashes - Finn in a leather jacket with a familiar blue lightsaber, Finn in scorched black armor and a red lightsaber, Finn in white armor bleeding out in the sand.

He focuses, trying to see what truly lies there - but the image shifts like a mirage, like the desert beneath his feet. It would concern him, but he senses his sister's hand, and lets it go.

Kylo Ren stares at Luke Skywalker and feels –

He looks old, and tired, and – hesitant. It is the hesitance that confuses him the most.

“Ben.” He flinches. He misses his mask. “I’m sorry. I failed you and I hurt you and there’s nothing I can do to make up for either of those things, but I’ve been informed that I have to try.” Near the Falcon, Han grumbles something, his arms crossed. “I’m not going to ask for forgiveness. Just – to help, if I can.”

Again, the apology. As if things could have been different – as if Luke Skywalker would not strike down darkness wherever he found it.

“You.” Han’s hand grips Luke’s shoulder. He looks angry, angrier than Kylo has ever seen him. “Are going to talk to my wife.”

“Ah. Yes.” Luke’s expression is tight as they begin to walk into the base.

Destiny grabs Kylo by the throat once more.

“Wait.” They stop. Kylo waves his hand vaguely in Rey’s direction. “I’ve trained her the best I can, but there’s only so much I can do.”

Luke tilts his head, and Kylo feels no power singing in the air. Luke narrows his eyes, but does not react, and then Han is steering him off. Kylo turns to go.

Rey stands in his way. Her eyes are wide and watery. He sees her swallow and does not understand.

"I can practice more," she says. Sand kicks up around them. "I can - you don't have to get rid of me, I'll work harder -"

Belatedly, Kylo gets it. Emotions spark in his stomach, too many to name.

"Skywalker can train you better than me." Why is this even... He gestures with his left hand, the Force inhibitor around it enough of an explanation.

Sand swirls and Rey stares.

"But - if we deal with Snoke, then you will be able to use the Force again, and - you can stay, and -"

"Snoke is the only reason I'm here!" He's shouting now. "Once he's dealt with I'm gone! You know that!"

"Your family /wants/ you!"

Rage, what he's feeling is rage. He wants to tear the world apart, he wants - but all of his feelings are trapped under his skin. He snarls back instead of destroying something.

"That's not my concern. You can keep them if you want them that badly."

Sand blasts his eyes, and when he clears them, Rey is gone.

Finn is keeping watch in case Rey is more prone to violence than she seemed when he feels something that makes him jolt up in his chair.

Kylo shifts from where he's leaning into Finn's shoulder. "Hm?"

"I." Finn swallows, tries to figure it out. "I think General Organa's shields just-"

"Ah." Kylo says, like that's nothing, like the blast of emotion hadn't felt like standing next to a reactor core. Then again, he wouldn't have felt it. "Probably arguing with Skywalker about me."

Finn nods, slow. Kylo shifts again, and then a moment later:

"You okay? She can be a lot." Kylo smiles, sardonic. "Trust me, I know."

"Yeah, just. Surprised me." All the looking and looking back that he and the General had done, and never had her control slipped for a moment. "Do you think it'll be a problem? Skywalker, I mean."

Kylo exhales, and slowly shakes his head.

Finn will keep an eye out, just in case.

Han asked for his help with tweaking the landing gear on the Falcon. It’s a transparent attempt, but Kylo feels the outline of Ben Solo trap him and hold him fast, so he goes. Listens to Han and Chewie argue about the details of a job and hands his father tools, and tries not to feel.

Rey finds him and sits on the half-open boarding ramp. She looks at him expectantly. He cannot tell what she’s waiting for.

Rey kicks her feet against the ground and exhales. “Look, I’m not gonna. Try and make you stay, or something dumb like that.” She lets out a breath. “And Poe and I talked, and I know I can stay here no matter what, so it’s not like I’ll be – alone.”

Rey fears being forgotten and overlooked, Kylo realizes. He cannot relate.

He shrugs, looking away. “…I should have talked to you, before handing over your teaching like that.” He remembers the sudden changes of his childhood, being sent away with no options (he thinks, he thinks, he cannot recall with clarity). “But you need teaching that I can’t give you.” He gestures with the wrist with the inhibitor on it.

Rey huffs, and pushes up off the floor. “I’ll see you at training!” She chirps.

“I just said –“ But Rey is already leaving. Kylo rolls his eyes.

“You’re good with her,” Han Solo says from the engines, watching Rey leave. Kylo can’t imagine what he means. Silence lingers, until – “You know, your mom and I, we talked about having a second kid, but….”

Kylo stares at him. The trailing words sound like an accusation, one that Kylo can’t blame him for making. The boy called Ben Solo was always more trouble than expected, more trouble than anyone could have been expected to deal with. Little wonder they never had another if there was a chance of another like him.

“With your mom’s career, it never seemed like a good time. We always thought the galaxy would get simpler after the war, not more complicated.” Han shoulder bumps him, casual. “But you’re doing pretty good at the whole big brother thing anyway.”

Han grins at him, and Kylo cannot tell if he is lying.

General Organa has another motive for training him. She has many, he imagines, and does not expect ever know them all.

“How long can you hide an entire ship?’

Finn pauses and looks at her. His first instinct is to answer – but then.

“I won’t be your tool,” he says.

In another life, he wouldn’t have refused. In another life, he would do anything for this woman and her cause, die for her because he believes that his death all he has to offer her. Service unto self-destruction.

In this life, he will offer nothing but what he must to survive and nothing more.

General Organa isn’t offended. She smiles at him, almost. “No. But we are allies, and this is a skill that will benefit both of us.”

The better he can hide from the Order, he thinks, the better he can hide from the Resistance. She is offering him a tool knowing he could turn it against her; trusting, somehow, that he will not.

Allies, working together for the benefit of both.

Trust.

"...I mostly worked with misdirection," he finally says. "Not something that will hold up over time."

General Organa does smile at him, this time. "Let's work on that, then."

Luke and Rey are meditating. Kylo feels superfluous, sitting numb and unconnected. But Rey had insisted. And maybe there’s something to it, watching his own thoughts and knowing that they are his and only his.

After an infinity, they come out of the Force. Rey is smiling – Luke’s expression is difficult to read.

“Hm. Non-conventional, maybe.” It takes Kylo a moment to realize Luke is addressing him. “But you’ve done well with her so far.”

Kylo stares. Rey grins at him, her “I told you so” evident even without the Force. Luke stares back for a moment, his face shifting in a dozen unreadable ways.

They have not spoken of the night that Kylo left the life of Ben Solo behind.

Luke shifts back to Rey and back to the guise of a mentor.

“Now, let me see your katas.”

Allies, Finn thinks again. A team, working together for the benefit of both. Like squadmates, but without the threat of being turned into reconditioning if you slip up. Trust, he thinks.

Finn hasn't dropped his mask around Kylo since he started training with the General.

Some choices are simple, if not easy. Grasping for any handhold on the sides of a pit, a chance at life against death. 

But choosing existence means further choices. One day, you may pull yourself out of the pit, and find that the world is no longer narrowed to “up” or “down.”

It is a kind of luxury, these choices.

But they still need to be made.

Finn shows up in Kylo’s rooms. He looks oddly out of place there during the day, as if his nights tucked against Kylo’s side are an illusion. Kylo is certain of so few thing lately.

He shuts the door behind him and leans against it.

“I’ve been training in the Force with General Organa.”

The words take time to process. Kylo stares at him, trying to assemble it into –

Later, he will pretend that his first response is anger. He will convince himself that he is offended, that his student finding a new teacher is an insult.

He is so alone inside of his head.

“Why – how could you not tell me?”

He’s shouting. It is anger, he thinks, he is furious.

Finn is –

“I – Look.” Finn is angry, truly angry. “Before, secrets were the only way I could keep safe. If the officers never found out about something they couldn’t use it against you.” Finn shakes his head. “But you’re not an officer and I don’t want to – work around you. I want to be a team. I want to work together.”

Kylo breathes. In, out.

Distantly, he understands. Of course the then-FN-2187 had been hiding from him, planning around him, ever ready to betray him if necessary. Just like a proper Sith apprentice. Kylo had any number of his own plans against his teacher. It was only fair. They were not equals.

But Finn – wants to be, maybe.

Finn could have left without him, he realizes, a bolt of lightning down his back. Hiding from Kylo would be nothing compared to hiding from Snoke, which means Finn wanted to be found, which meant – Finn wants to be with him.

Kylo looks up. Finn is still there, posture guarded, braced for reaction but not leaving.

Kylo lets out a breath. Finn approaches, slowly, and sits next to him on the bed.

“I want to be your – ally,” Finn says, the word settling oddly in his mouth.

Against his will, Kylo smiles a little. “…us against the galaxy?” he mutters, a line out of an old holodrama.

“Yeah.” When he looks over, Finn is smiling.

Rey finds him tucked in one of his corners. But she doesn’t try to sneak up on him and sends a pulse of awareness to let him know she’s coming, so he doesn’t hide himself from her.

He still hides his materials, but she looks him in the eye and asks:

“You’re building a lightsaber, right?”

Finn nods. Maybe he should have concealed it better, but –

Rey nods, looking down, deep in thought. Finn feels a choice being made – She looks up and holds something out to him. 

It’s a power cell, the last mechanical piece he needs. He hasn’t come to an accord with the crystal, but the casing is only missing this piece.

“Kylo’s gonna need someone to watch his back. When you guys leave, you’ll look after him, right?”

Finn cannot imagine being so vulnerable as to ask such a thing. But – he flickers his shields, enough for her to know he’s telling the truth.

“Yeah.”

“Soooo.” Kylo refuses to look up as Poe slides into the chair across from him. “You and Finn.”

Kylo glares to the side. He’s suddenly very aware of his hair in braids, done not with the Force but gentle, careful fingers and more blisteringly intimate for it.

He does not know what to call them. Teacher and student no longer, allies or partners seeming too small.

Each day, Finn could go anywhere in the galaxy and chooses to come back to him.

When he looks back, Poe is – Kylo does not know what to call the expression, only that it is not cruel.

“It’s just that I expected to be the one with a cute boyfriend,” Poe says, and Kylo realizes that he is being teased.

The part of him that was once called Ben rolls his eyes and snaps back, “No, you seem to have a cute girlfriend instead.”

Poe blinks, and laughs, and Kylo cannot name the emotion flooding him.

It’s only for a little while, he reassures himself. He can wear Ben Solo’s face a little longer.

Finn drops out of the Force technique the General was running him through and takes a moment to settle himself within himself.

General Organa looks at him and he does not understand her expression. He would look, but she has allowed him his mind.

"Ben trained you well," she says.

He stares at her. Choices flicker in the air around him. You never correct an officer - and yet -

"Kylo." General Organa goes very still. "He told me he wanted to be called Kylo."

Kylo is his squadmate, his partner, his choice over and over. And the general is Kylo’s - something important, that he does not name. They have watched each other across a dozen meetings without saying a word.

General Organa is Looking at him. Finn swallows, and lets her look.

“…Kylo, then.” Her voice has a reverb, an emotion that Finn does not recognize. “I’ll remember that.”

The moment shutters. General Organa reorganizes herself, a process Finn can’t help but watch with interest. She folds her fingers.

“We can get access to the Order’s computer network, but to neutralize the base itself Rose will need to get within a certain distance, and remain there for at least an hour. We have a ship, we have a pilot, but we don’t have any means of dodging their surveillance. If anyone can do it, it’s you.” Finn nods. He is not surprised. “This is not an order.”

Allies, he thinks. Teamwork between equals.

“I’ll do it.”

Not for the first time, Kylo thinks of erasure. Ceasing to exist, slipping away into nothingness. His absence would not leave a gap, he thinks. Poe was always a better Ben Solo than him, anyway.

Not good enough to be Ben, not strong enough to be Kylo, only useful as a tool in Snoke’s hands - 

The door to his room slides open. Finn doesn’t ask permission to enter, now.

They do not speak. Finn just settles against his side, one arm around one of his, skin against skin.

Finn, brilliant and clever. Finn could go anywhere and become anyone. But he remains, weighing exposure and battle against not having Kylo by his side.

For now, the balance is his favor.

Kylo turns, throws his other hand over Finn’s shoulder, pulls him closer.

Luke Skywalker and Kylo Ren approach - they must have just finished with Rey. Finn is only aware enough to keep watch and be aware of anyone approaching, most of his attention focused on the crystal floating in front of him. He doesn’t hide his work from them.

The casing of his saber is almost complete. But Finn still hasn't put the crystal in.

Finn doesn't look up when they peer over his shoulder. “We’re negotiating.”

Kylo blinks. “….negotiating?”

Finn nods absently, only partially aware of his own physical form. “I’m not going to bleed it. But I’m not going to be led by it, either.”

“Hm.” Kylo sits next to him. He’s a black hole in the Force, but his skin is still warm and his hand is still welcome on Finn’s arm.

Behind them, Skywalker is silent. He's - curious. Finn feels a gentle prod to his shields - not an invasion, but feeling out the edges, finding where the boundaries are. A flicker of surprise, at the boundary between Finn and the crystal.

The Jedi of old would immerse themselves in the Force, let their hands be moved by something larger than themselves. A total exposure, with nothing held back.

Finn will not do such a thing. But -

He narrows his eyes, thinking. Skywalker draws back and returns to a mirage in the corner of his senses.

Kylo remains at his side, an ally now rather than teacher or student.

Finn twitches his shields aside, a sliver of opening that could be closed in an instant. The crystal responds, a flicker of acknowledgement.

Kyber is not alive. It does not have a self. But it has a sort of memory - and this crystal /remembers/, the symphony of a million crystals slowly devolving into a single harsh note, each of its fellows overpowered by something stronger. It remembers the mighty and overpowering will, crystals around it breaking and bleeding.

Finn exhales.

The crystal chimes in time.

Teamwork, he thinks.

Finn had pulled him close, forehead to forehead, and said nothing for a long moment. Kylo felt the absence of the Force like a gaping silence.

Then he pulled back, said "I'll be back," and boarded Dameron's ship to be their disguise while they disable the base. 

Three hours have passed, and Kylo hasn't left the docking bay. Chewie comes by, patting Kylo on the head and rumbling something reassuring. Han offers distraction in the form of Falcon repairs, but Kylo waves him away. He doesn’t want to move. He should.

He could be doing anything. Training. Working with Rey.

Except Rey hasn't left the docking bay either.

The small ship comes out of hyperspace just out of range of the Finalizer’s sensors. Starkiller base – Illum – is a glowing orb in the distance. Finn’s senses blur, the familiar shape of the Finalizer a shadow on his mind.

“We going dark?”

Poe is professional and focused. Rose is a tightly contained blur of anxiety, like a wound spring.

Finn feels for the edges of the ship, the echoes of the cut off communication lines and the ion trail.

“Yeah.”

He closes his eyes, grabs the emptiness of space, and wraps the ship in darkness.

The other woman with the necklace sits on the next bench over. Kylo watches her out of the corner of her eye, and after a moment, she laughs under her breath.

“Sorry, I should – I’m Paige. Rose’s big sister.” Ah, Kylo thinks. Paige tugs on her necklace, traces the pattern on the gold. “We’ve… never been on different assignments before. General Organa has always put us on the same ship.” She takes a deep breath and tucks the necklace into her shirt. “It’ll be fine. Rose is the toughest person I know.”

Rey nods with a sympathetic noise. She looks up from where she’s folded up on the floor. “I – I don’t think I had any siblings, before.” For some reason, Rey leans against Kylo’s knee – for some reason, he doesn’t push her away. “What’s it like?”

Kylo looks down at her, a terrible suspicion burning in his stomach.

After an hour or so, Luke Skywalker comes by with something floating behind him.

“You know, we’d let you know the moment something happened.” Kylo looks away, feeling chastised and angry about it. Finn would drop the hiding if anything happened. Rey would /know/ if Poe was hurt.

Paige shuffles. “Yeah, I know.” Her smile is rueful. “But /still/.”

To Kylo’s surprise, Luke smiles back and floats covered trays over. “I know. That’s why I brought lunch.”

Rey straightens up and waves two of the trays over, passing one up to Kylo.

Kylo looks down at the meal – fetched for him, rather than someone trying to get him to move. His need to be here when Finn returned allowed for, even accepted.

He swallows. The meal tastes like ash in his mouth.

Kylo paces, tugging on his sleeves, tearing apart a piece of filmsi. At some point, one of the ship tech offers him a tangle of plastic, something that twists around itself and spins. Kylo is too stressed to refuse it. He assumes it’s to protect their documents. He twists the plastic in his fingers.

Rey is calm now, half present and half in the Force. She smiles at him, trying to reassure him. She can sense the ship in the Force. It should reassure him.

But Kylo cannot sense anything. He cannot tell if Finn is safe. He is helpless, forced to rely on others –

-He wouldn’t blame Finn for leaving, he can’t –

The ship lands.

He’s distantly aware of Paige and Rose hugging, of Rey picking Poe up and spinning him around. He’s barely aware, because Finn – Finn is there, and smiling at him, and –

“You waited for me,” Finn says, and he sounds – he sounds surprised, as if there was anywhere else Kylo could be. Kylo opens his mouth to respond – but Finn is kissing him, and that’s better.

Kylo barely pays any attention to the meeting, too high on Finn pressed against his side, the warmth of hand wrapped in hand, the giddiness of being close to him in public. He tunes out discussion of the control of Starkiller base, what they might do in the future -

“And that’s one less threat to the galaxy, thanks to the information from Finn and Kylo.” Kylo jolts in his chair. Finn grips his hand, once. “Well done, everyone.”

Kylo sees her and knows that she sees him and feels the pull of destiny.

Everyone else filters out of the meeting room, but General Organa remains. Finn squeezes his hand – a question. Kylo shakes his head, and walks over alone.

“You called me Kylo.” 

“Finn was very clear on your preferences.” A rush of warmth fills his stomach. “You’ve trained him well. Rey too. They’re both going to be brilliant.”

Kylo sits across from – General Organa. Leia. Mother. He does not meet her eyes. Even without the Force he thinks her gaze would flay him to the bone.

He tugs on the Force inhibitor. He does not remove it. He does not want to know if she’s lying.

"Why did you leave?"

He stares down at the material around his wrist. He thinks about finding out the truth of her parentage. About his teacher standing over him with a lightsaber. A voice in his head, echoing over and over until there was nothing but echo.

But he is too tired and empty to deflect. He shrugs one shoulder.

"It was my destiny." As it was his destiny to return, he thinks. Forever pulled in two directions, forever torn apart.

A sigh. He does not look up.

"Destiny doesn't exist."

He looks up. He cannot understand her expression. He cannot understand her words. Her, of all people –

“There is no destiny,” she says, her hands folded in front of her. “There is no fate. Anakin Skywalker was not destined to fall, and Luke was not destined to rise.”

“-The will of the Force,” Kylo begins, but does not know what to say after.

“Just because something /wants/ doesn’t mean it can or should determine what happens.” He stares at her, her casual dismissal of the greatest power of the galaxy. She has a will that turned the tide of history, he thinks. Like Finn, setting his feet and refusing to be moved. “There is no destiny. There is just us and the choices we make and the consequences we have to live with.”

Something in her face shifts.

“Ben,” She says, and then stops. “I’m sorry. Kylo.”

All of his words are clogged in his throat, too densely packed to know what any of them are.

She reaches across the desk and touches the inhibitor around his wrist, gently. “I was not fated to fail you. I should have protected you from him. But I didn’t.”

“I –“

So many words, none of them quite forgiveness or acceptance, stumble through his mind. None of them manage to come out of his mouth.

“I’ll do everything I can to help you disappear, once Snoke is gone. You can disappear now, though I’m not sure we can deal with him without you. Start a new life, on your own terms, nothing to live up to /or/ down to.” She breathes for a moment. “I am not sending you away. But I will let you go. It’s up to you.

“What do you want?”

He doesn’t reply.

Her voice is gentle. “Think about it.”

Alone in the hall, alone in his head, Kylo Ren thinks.

There is no destiny. There is only us, and the choices we make. There is only what we want, and what we are willing to do for it.

What does he want?

He knocks on the door and it slides open before he can change his mind.

Finn looks up from his finished lightsaber and smiles at him.

**Author's Note:**

> Shout out to ktula, the best cheerleader <3


End file.
